So Much Potential.....

I didn't really care for 2008. I think it is because I lived it in 2 week increments. I didn't have to but it somehow ended up that way. I remember thinking up until perhaps May that it was kind of interesting to live life that way - that was before we were sent to the RE and the urologist. I also feel as if we lost a period of time, between the situation in March and going on vacation in September. I now feel that I was a shadow of myself during that time and perhaps further back from them. My enjoyment of life seems to have dwindled during this whole TTC experience. My go-getter, I must do a million things at a time attitude was virtually at a standstill. I feel like I became someone else.

In September/October I wanted myself back. I went to a counselor and between each meeting I set small goals for myself. I got back into things I enjoyed. I got back into my schoolwork. I decided i needed to change jobs and do things that I enjoyed. I am not back to normal but what is normal when you are in the midst of the craziest battle that you never expected to be in. 2009 has great potential because i know what I do not want to become this year. Yes, there are some major goals that I have set for the year - to finish the degree, to start a dance school, to build my company, to live according to a realistic budget, to do a 1/2 marathon, to get pregnant (possible through Adventure 2009) and possibly have a baby (that could be 2010). All but the last I can control to some degree and that makes me feel good. The last one is what we both want the most and have no idea what it will take to achieve it.

DH has been added to this blog. I don't know if he'll post anything but at least he has access.